Monday, February 16, 2009

Name Drafting-Warning Dirty Nasty Horrible Words! Use Caution When Viewing!

Slide Show of Dirty Nasty Horrible Words used as inspiration in Name Drafting

I got something special to show you, are you ready? Alright then...So you have someone who is a real jackass in your life? They could be a family member, friend, enemy...You could love them lots...or hate them with a passion. Then I have the perfect gift, a lovely handwoven scarf, blanket, or towel that utilizes words and phrases you would really love to say to these assholes...

These Name Drafts are very fun to do, and there is an endless variety of patterns that can be made.
I will explain how I did these drafts here and then you can use them however you like...If you are a nice and loving person you can create some beautiful things with children's names and birth dates, or a wedding throw for a happy new couple...I have done these in the past and it has been very satisfying. But this is a warped bitch blog, hence the nasty ass tone that I am using with these drafts.

As I wrote in my post of yesterday:

I was really into Name Drafting in 2000 and 2001...I made some lovely things, baby blankets mostly, that were woven using Name Drafting. I did not have any weave programs, this was done the old fashioned way on graft paper with color pencils. I remember riding the train into Manhattan from the station near my home in Newtown, Connecticut (Bethel Station). It was 11/2 hours at least to get into Grand Central one way. I would bring my big heavy pattern book, weave notebook, and grafting paper...with pencils and crayons...and work on patterns using names, dates, and loving terms of endearment. I would weave these patterns with love and give them as gifts to friends and family. It is such a beautiful thing to give something so personal and special to those you adore...But now things have changed, I have become jaded and pissed with this new found angst (well it was always there but I had more control over it back then) I am off to see what lovely patterns can come of nasty words...Imagine giving a gift to someone you can't stand, like your mother-in-law who has always been a bitch to you. It is woven so carefully and a beauty to behold. Little does she know that the pattern you designed just for her is based on words that are coded and drafted to produce an ultimate insult...

Okay, so if you look here and here and here you will find some fabulous information about Name Drafting, these are serious and beautiful links. But I will go ahead and give you a quickie right here and right now...

I will use the first nasty expression for this example, because it is something I say to my husband on a daily basis. I love the bastard to pieces but he is a real idiot at times...

So I used the phrase "Fucking Asshole Shithead" "Damn You" as the "name" in my weave draft.

On a 8 harness loom with 8 treadles: Write out the alphabet then count to 8 and put this number beside letter, like so:


These do not line up just perfect but I think you catch my drift...yes?

So If you have a 6 harness loom with 6 treadles then you would count to 6 and put this number beside the letter, like so:


I guess you could really come up with your own code if you want, it is all in fun anyway so why be a stickler for perfection...

The above picture is one repeat of this pattern below, I have color coded the words and numbers to the thread colors above.

This is the top series of numbers in the picture, the threading sequence.

Anyway, I took the phrase FuckingAssholeShithead and translated it into this: 6533167133874538148514
I then added a number before and after these core numbers to help balance the pattern out, so that 2 warp threads are equal to one letter, you got it? So the threading pattern became: 67452334815678 12342381673456 2378813478561245

This is the right side series of numbers in the picture, the treadle sequence.

So then I took the phrase DamnYou and translated it into this:
I then added a number before and after these core numbers so that two weft threads are equal to one letter. So the treadling pattern became: 34124567 817845

I had the tie up on this particular draft set up as a plain there it is.

The patterns I have done are as follows:

First nasty expression, "fuckingassholeshithead" used as warp threading, "damnyou" used as treadle pattern in a plain weave tie up.

Second Nasty Expression- Inspired by "feralcvntass" used as warp threading, "fuckyoubitch" used as treadle pattern in a basketweave tie up.
(And as a side note, I have edited the c-word to use a v were the u should be...because this word may be so vulgar that even a warped bitch would wence when saying it...well...actually... no I wouldn't, but for the sake of those who would be offended...)

Third Nasty Expression For Mrs. Warp: Using "fuckyoubitch" for both warp threading and treadle pattern, in a 2-2 Left Twill...I know just how much Mrs. Warp loves these twills

Again the link to the Flickr pictures is:

I also want to link up the demo I used for the pictures, I loved this program and have to add it to my wish list:

Thank you,
Wefty Woman
One Warped Bitch

I added a new pattern...Give it a look see--->


Anonymous said...

Bwhahahaha!! I've never been so inspired to learn a new craft. Seriously, I'm going to start putting money aside to make "special" handmade Christmas gifts this year.

PB::JJ::WW said...

Yaaaahooo and another one gets warped! That is what this site is all about. Getting folks interested in way or another...

Some great links to start getting more info on weaving...if anyone gives a damn.


Mrs. Warp said...

HOLEEEYYY SHIT! I am loving this!

VERY inspiring! I am in love with your mind Wefty!

And thanks for the till, I *DO* love them :)

keep up the AMAZING work!

Mrs. Warp said...


PB::JJ::WW said...

You could use this with any words, just imagine...

A nice warm throw for Great Aunt Alice, with a pattern based on "Shut up, you old bag."

Or a baby blanket, with "I'm a mistake" and "Thanks Broken Condom" as the threading sequence.

Or a "sex towel" (ya'll know what those are...) that is woven with one of these phrases, "Was it good for you"... "Damn you're smooth"... or "Fast draw and tiny gun"

-Wefty Woman

PB::JJ::WW said...

Here is a link to a new pattern:

Sex Towel with "Fast Draw and Tiny Gun" as inspiration...

Miranda's Loom said...

You are hilarious JJ!!! I'm so glad you posted all of this, I learned name drafting in college but it's been so long that I forgot how to do it. :) ~Leann

Michele said...

You are a GODDESS!! I have about 15 looms, 2 floor looms and numerous tapestry or frame looms and suffer from severe Warping fear!!
I have been self taught ~ talk about the idiot leading the fool!!
You have inspired and encouraged me to face that fucking floor loom ~ armed with a wicked warp and tell it to go to hell, cause I am GOING TO LEARN THIS!!
I sign up for a class locally this month and will then consider myself a recovering loomphobic.
The horrible thing about this is I collect the damn things because I have dreamt of weaving since the 80s... I want to tahnk you for helping my dream come true!!

PB::JJ::WW said...

Hey Michelle I am so glad you liked that nasty name draft. Hell ya, tell that fuckin' warp who's boss...

I am working on another post for regarding inspiration for colours and design...hope it meets your standards...

-Wefty Woman